![]() ![]() The way the body talks is “ an outward reflection of your emotional condition,” according to Allan Pease, also known as “Mr. It’s hard to do, isn’t it? If somebody who is talking to you raises their eyebrows and the topic isn’t one that would logically cause surprise, worry, or fear, there is something else going on.The thing is, the body has a lot to say. Try raising your eyebrows when you’re having a relaxed casual conversation with a friend. There are three main emotions that make your eyebrows go up: surprise, worry, and fear. If you’re talking with someone whose stare is making you squirm - especially if they’re very still and unblinking - something is up and they might be lying you. On average, Americans hold eye contact for seven to ten seconds, longer when we’re listening than when we’re talking. The problem is that most of them overcompensate and hold eye contact to the point that it feels uncomfortable. But that’s such common knowledge that people will often deliberately hold eye contact in an attempt to cover up the fact that they’re lying. Most of us probably grew up hearing, “Look me in the eye when you talk to me!” Our parents were operating under the assumption that it’s tough to hold someone’s gaze when you’re lying to them, and they were right to an extent. ![]() Maintaining good posture commands respect and promotes engagement, whether you’re a leader or not. Slouching, on the other hand, is the result of collapsing your form it appears to take up less space and projects less power. Standing up straight with your shoulders back is a power position it appears to maximize the amount of space you fill. The brain is hardwired to equate power with the amount of space people take up. Have you ever seen a person walk into a room, and immediately, you have known that they were the one in charge? That effect is largely about body language, and often includes an erect posture, gestures made with the palms facing down, and open and expansive gestures in general. This knowledge can be especially useful when you’re negotiating, because it shows you what the other person is really thinking about the deal. It’s a sign that the conversation is going well and that the other party is receptive to your message. Mirroring body language is something we do unconsciously when we feel a bond with the other person. Have you ever been in a meeting with someone and noticed that every time you cross or uncross your legs, they do the same? Or perhaps they lean their head the same way as yours when you’re talking? That’s actually a good sign. Copying your body language is a good thing. If they aren’t there, that smile is hiding something.ģ. People often smile to hide what they’re really thinking and feeling, so the next time you want to know if someone’s smile is genuine, look for crinkles at the corners of their eyes. Genuine smiles reach the eyes, crinkling the skin to create crow’s feet around them. When it comes to smiling, the mouth can lie but the eyes can’t. These people know the power that unspoken signals have in communication, and they monitor body language accordingly. TalentSmart has tested more than a million people and found that the upper echelons of top performance are filled with people who are high in emotional intelligence (90 percent of top performers, to be exact). When you’re working hard and doing all you can to achieve your goals, anything that can give you an edge is powerful and will streamline your path to success. Learning how to become aware of and to interpret that 55 percent can give you a leg up with other people. As for the rest, 38 percent comes from tone of voice and the remaining 55 percent comes from body language. UCLA research has shown that only 7 percent of communication is based on the actual words we say. You already pick up on more body language cues than you’re consciously aware of. And who hasn’t wanted to read people’s minds at some point? Body language provides an amazing amount of information on what other people are thinking if you know what to look for.
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